I am backwards. Always have been, but it’s never been so apparent as when I’m sick or hurting.

Most people, when they’re sick, wake up feeling like warmed-over death and gradually improve as the day goes on.

Most people, after a heavy workout, wake up stiff and sore and loosen up a bit as the day goes on.

Not I, sugarpie. I wake up feeling GREAT! And AWESOME! And that continues until about lunchtime, when my body just goes “OH HELLLL NOOOOOOO” and then things start falling apart on me.

For instance: I’ve been battling a cough for a few days now and it sucks. I wake up feeling more or less okay, and that gets me up until about lunchtime. Then I start coughing a little bit, which turns into a lot bit, which turns into a Man Cold.

[If you’ve never experienced a Man Cold, count yourself lucky. I’d rather give birth again, honestly.]

I’ve even managed to get to the gym before the body gives out. So backwards.

I want this cough to go away already.

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