Because we don’t celebrate Xmas, there isn’t a huge amount of pressure on us to buy a bunch of gifts for people. We get a few things for our nearest and dearest, but aside from that, you people are on your own.

Instead, we take advantage of ridiculous sales. For myself, with my rock & roll ninja lifestyle, I don’t require much in the way of wardrobe. I have a few bits and pieces that I spent a lot of money on and the rest of it is from Old Navy. Cute enough stuff at the right price! It’s mostly worth it.

I say “mostly” because, as with any mass-produced clothing, the sizing is bizarre at times and not consistent between styles or even within the same style. I’m willing to put up with that for $15 jeans, but sometimes it’s ridiculous.

My arms are too long for my body. It’s just the way I’m made, but there are very few long-sleeved tops that cover my arms all the way AND fit me everywhere else, too. I buy a lot of things in L or XL because of this. It’s annoying, friends! I just bought a new hoodie sweatshirt from Old Navy because my old one is literally disintegrating. I tried on some of the women’s styles, but I hate hate hate “fitted” things because they never fit me correctly. Long arms, long torso, you see.

So I tried on the size L in the men’s section and it fit comfortably across my shoulders but the arms were too damn short. WTF? Annnnnnoying. I bought the XL instead, and the arms are plenty long but there is a lot going on in the rest of it. It’s a fair enough trade.

Jeans, then. I have issues with my jeans shrinking. I suppose I could line-dry them and solve that problem, but that involves line-drying and other things I don’t have any interest in doing. I can’t even be bothered to separate my colors from my whites, how on earth can I be expected to hang shit up? Thus, the jeans, they shrink.

And not in the waist/hip area, which you’d expect. Oh, no. They shrink in the legs. So, my jeans fit beautifully for a little while, then much later, seemingly overnight, they lose about three inches in the legs. That is so weird.

This time, I bought boot-cut and they fit fantastically except the legs of them are about 5 inches TOO LONG. I have no idea what’s happening with that, but I’m sure that by the time spring rolls around, they’ll be floods.

I know this is a combination of me being weirdly-shaped (it’s true) and me buying cheap-ass Old Navy clothes. However, between the kid, the dogs, cleaning the house, and doing beer stuff at the beer store, my clothes basically have to be disposable. Paying $15 for jeans that I don’t care about destroying seems like a reasonable amount to pay, even if they are too long in the legs.

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