Yeah there was no way in hell I was going to be able to write something every day. The older I get, the more honest I am with myself and I am just not capable (or interested, really) in doing something like this every day.
That said, I would like to express massive gratitude for my friends. Yeah, yeah, everyone’s friends are awesome but mine as THE BEST.
Three years ago, I had a day in early December that I have come to call “The Bad Day.” It was pretttttty much the worst day of my life, which is really saying something if you know about some of the adventures I have had in my 47-ish years. It was not the kind of day Ice Cube was rapping about. It was A Bad Day.
It was the kind of thing that some people might keep to themselves and just try to deal with it alone. I am not that person. I used to be – mostly because I didn’t know if I would have support if I started to fall over. TURNS OUT, I have more support than Dolly Parton’s bra. But I didn’t know that when I started talking about it. I just knew that I could NOT handle The Bad Day on my own.
I texted a friend the next day and said “I need to come over to your house and cry and get snot on things.” No hesitation: “come on over.”
I told my friend gang via our message board. Immediately, there were messages of support and love and offers to murder and all the good things that friends are there to provide.
I told my gym fam. They were appropriately shocked and then stepped back and just let me get on with things, and they all, bless them, totally ignored me getting tears and snot on the weights.
I met another friend for drinks after work one day and we sat at the bar and drank margaritas and developed amazingly goopy head colds together while I cried and coughed and got snot on things.
(There were lots of boogers involved)j
I told my local coven of bitch witches and they just handed me wine and offered up shoveling services, soft-ground backyards, tarps, and job offers.
I told another friend and that one let me do a WHOLE LOT OF YELLING and then took me out to stick a hole in my nose.
And that was just due to The Bad Day. LITTLE DID WE KNOW that Covid was about to happen, and then The Bike Ride That Wasn’t, and all of the bullshit surrounding all of those things.
The friends, all of them, were THERE for me and my family in both big and small ways, and have been there for me literally every single day since then. I love them all more than I can ever express and they’re all extremely good-looking.
So it was nice, this past week, when I schlepped out to the east coast to go see a band that none of my friends have heard of (except through me). At first I was just going to go to the show and come home but then I reached out to some people and decided to stay another day. I’m so glad I did. One friend met me in the city and we made the evening into an adventure (as we do). The coven decided that we needed to go to Costco, on a Friday night, in a big group. So that’s what we did. And still others agreed to meet me for breakfast before I drove back home.
What could have been a lonely solo trip turned into two and a half days of laughing and nonsense, in the best ways. Everyone should have friends like mine. My only regret is that I kind of planned it last-minute and there were folks that I didn’t see because there wouldn’t have been enough time to do more than “hi! bye!” and you all deserve more than that! Butt-touching, at minimum!
I hope that I am there for my friends in the same ways they are there for me. I do try, honest I do, and I’m getting better at it, I think. Maybe not, I’m sure at least one person is like “that bitch never called me back!” which… yeah I probably didn’t but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you! I’m not good at everyday things, but if you need a pint of blood or a kidney, I’m here for you!
I am trying to get better at the day-to-day things, though. I’ll get there someday, probably right around the time I start giving my friends’ eulogies. Sorry, guys. You know I love you, right?