Category Archives: Movies

Everyone’s favorite: A list of random crap!

1. If you’re getting here via Tomato Nation comments, I apologize for making you read this drivel. I have one more book to offer – just drop me a comment and we’ll hash it out.

2. Nice job, USA track & field relay teams. Dropping the baton is a great way to go.

3. Ms. Prufrock called me cool (or awesome or something else nice, I forget what it was exactly) the other day so now I feel obligated to post and post brilliantly more often. This one’s for you, Pru!

4. I have approximately four Very Important Projects to work on, so naturally I’ve been spending far too much time on Facebook. I can’t help myself – between the stalking opportunities and Pieces of Flair, it’s a perfect place for someone like myself who… ooh, shiny!

5. The Jillian is starting to speak English with a lot more fluency these days. I can’t keep up with her sometimes. Girlfriend can even count to ten! I don’t know if she knows what it means, exactly, but it sounds good.

6. She’s ‘reading’ Snow White right now. I’m a little bit grossed out by Snow White and her desire to be saved by a handsome prince and all of that. So when I read it to her, I can’t help but interject my own commentary which is usually along the lines of “… because Snow White is a NINNY.” Snow White needs to get herself a clue and take care of her ownself. And for fuck’s sake – who doesn’t learn the rule about taking candy (or apples) from strangers? Does she have no Stranger Danger instinct at all? I think Snow White is a bit touched in the head, to be quite honest.

7. If it’s not obvious, can I just tell you all how much I am dreading Jillian’s absorption into the Disney Machine? I don’t mind the old-skool Mickey Mouse stuff so much, but the Disney Princesses make me want to hurt myself. But I will gladly put up with any amount of Princess crap as long as it keeps those Bratz dolls out of my house. Those things are truly scary.

8. So, I’m a little bit ashamed to admit this but I just read “The Notebook” by Nicholas Sparks. It suuuuuuuuuuuuucked. The movie was about 12 times better, and I don’t think I have ever said that about any movie made from a book. Mr. Sparks cannot write for shit, yet he is a bestselling author. Just goes to show that we live in a culture that doesn’t give a fuck about what it’s consuming (see also Cheez Doodles, McDonald’s, MTV). My mom’s dog can write better dialogue than Sparks can.

9. I probably had a real reason to post today but I’ll be damned if I can remember what it was.

10. Because ten is a nice place to end this.


Filed under Books, Jillian, Me Me Me, Movies, Other People, Stuff, Teh Internets

The internet has let me down

We’re watching The Great Escape (for the sixth billionth time) and I am going insane trying to find out who plays the Hitler Youth kid on the train after the escape. I could swear it’s Richard Gere, but he’s not credited and his IMDB listing only goes back to 1973 or something.

And wasn’t Richard Gere is M*A*S*H? I know he was in the TV series, but I could SWEAR that he’s one of the MPs from the post-operation scene in Japan. He doesn’t have any lines but spends the 4 seconds or however long he’s on-screen chomping on his gum. I swear I’m not making this up – we’ve watched that movie hundreds of times.

This sort of thing drives me batty, which is why I had to start digging around on the internet. I haven’t found confirmation or a firm denial of either of these two theories of mine, and that is sad. The internet always delivers! ALWAYS!

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Filed under Movies, Teh Internets

See? See what I mean?

This Jools Holland show just gets awesomer and awesomer every time I watch it. New Order is on this episode and they’re playing “Transmission.” OMG.

That reminds me, has that movie about Joy Division come out yet? I don’t know anyone in New Jersey who would want to go see it with me. In fact, the only person on earth I know of who would be interested is Terri, and she’s in Ohio with a brand-new baby-person.

Maybe I should start getting Entertainment Weekly again. As craptacular as that rag sometimes is, at least it was a way to stay in the loop with movies and stuff. Nowadays, I don’t even realize a movie has come out until it shows up in Redbox. Hee.

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Filed under Movies, Music

Redefining my limits

I watch a LOT of bad TV, I have to admit. But I’m usually doing something constructive at the same time (knitting, sudoku, clipping my toenails), and that balances out the universe.

Also, I have no real problem with the bad TV I choose to watch. It’s the bad TV that I do not choose that gives me hives.

And I have limits. Freddie tried to make us watch the “Cavemen” show last night but it was so putrid, even HE couldn’t watch it. And this man thinks Christopher Titus is funny.

I have limits, you see. I can’t watch REALLY bad TV. It makes my IQ go down, and kids – if my IQ goes any lower, I’m going to be male.

I have limits with regard to bad movies, too. I generally steer clear of movies involving CGI-talking babies and/or animals but Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties is on my TV right now and Jillian is mesmerized by it. She loves cats, and every time she sees one in a book or on TV, she goes insane. Imagine what she does when she sees our actual cat!

Thus, G:ATTK is befouling my TV. If it keeps Jillian from attempting to vault over the back of the sofa, so be it. I’m trying to ignore it.

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Filed under Jillian, Movies, TV

Today’s mediocre movie

Is Just Like Heaven.

I have a weird fascination with Reese Witherspoon (between Sweet Home Alabama and Legally Blonde, I might never have to watch anything else, ever.) and of course, Mark Ruffalo always makes the day go a bit faster. He’s the only reason why I have sat through the utterly craptastic Rumor Has It at least three times. Ugh. I’m sure Jennifer Aniston is a lovely person, but as an actress, she has exactly zero range. And Kevin Costner…. ick.

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Filed under Movies

Guilty? Sure. Pleasure? Not so much

Mike at Strollerderby expressed his glee at VH1’s afternoon TV offerings and that got me thinking.

See, I get to watch a lot of afternoon TV, too, since that’s usually naptime AND the hottest part of the day. We are in the house in the PM, is what I’m saying.

I usually have some reasonable movie on the DVR to watch (The Breakfast Club gets a lot of mileage because I don’t have the DVD for some odd reason), but sometimes I just get tired of the things I already own and start flipping the channels.

Today it’s Message in a Bottle and this movie pisses me off like nothing else. The first time I ever saw it, I was sick as a damn dog and home from work one day and all I wanted to do was watch some nice, cheesy chick-flick thing and forget about my snots for awhile.

“A ha!” I thought. “This will fit the bill!”

OH BOY was I wrong. No happy ending! HE DIES. That suuuuuuuuuuuucks. I remember being actually angry at the TV for showing me this movie. And now I’m watching it again because:

  • there is nothing else on
  • I had to get on the treadmill so I wasn’t listening to it anyway
  • it’s really, really hot this afternoon
  • I am putting off vacuuming.
  • So yeah. I’m hating on this movie with an irrational kind of dislike reserved for certain small children and The Pepsi Girl.

    Best thing? Thanks to the magic of HBO West, I can watch it AGAIN.

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    Filed under Me Me Me, Movies

    What’s with today, today?

    I am watching Empire Records right now on the Mojo channel and it’s bothering me. I have seen this movie approximately 8,622 times and when it doesn’t go exactly as I remember it, I get confused!

    Plus, I woke up at 5:30 this morning, thanks to my evil baby who apparently does not need to sleep anymore.

    So I’m watching it and there are extra scenes! In the beginning, there’s this whole scene where Corey gets her acceptance letter to Harvard and I don’t recall ever seeing that before.

    So now I feel like I should sit down and watch it rather than just have it on in the background. I hate that.

    On the other hand, this movie is really quite bad but I find myself quoting it an awful lot. Hm.

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    Filed under Movies

    The more you watch something…

    … the more details you notice.

    I’ve seen The Breakfast Club at least one hundred times, no exaggeration. However, I’m watching it right now and I just noticed something.

    They’re in the library at the school, right? On the door of the library are the hours: Mon-Fri 8:00AM to 3:30PM. Seems about right, doesn’t it? But it also says: Closed Sat. – Sun.

    And that’s… weird. It’s in a school, so wouldn’t it be closed on the weekends by definition?


    Filed under Movies