Further adventures of Fattie McFatPants

After a week off due to illness and car troubles, my trainer and I were able to meet again on Tuesday. I don’t feel like she’s killing me anymore, and I’m getting better at pushing my own limits and not being a pussy when things start to get too hard. I would be the biggest slacker ever, if I felt like it, and so this is sort of hard for me.

I am seeing results, though. I’m definitely feeling the results, which is motivation enough to keep me going. I have a goal and I WILL REACH IT.

The thing is, I don’t know how much I weigh. I know what I weighed when I started this a month ago (218 *barf*), but between the wacky scale at the gym and my craptastical scale here at home, I don’t know what I weigh at present. I’m okay with this, I think. I’m just girly enough to get obsessed with the number instead of how I feel or what my clothes are up to, so maybe it’s best that I just don’t have a scale that I can really rely on.

My eating habits are improving. I’ve always ate fairly well (whole-ish foods, etc), but dairy and sweets are my downfall. So I’m gradually reducing the amount of dairy in my life [sob] and the sweets thing will be easy since it’s nearly summer and that means fruit.

A lot of people I know do Weight Watchers and they SWEAR by it, but I’ve done it and it didn’t work for me. I could never get past the annoyance at being talked to like I was some kind of imbecile. You mean grilled chicken is better for you than fried? GET OUT OF TOWN! Stuff like that, which is so… *duuuuh* but was like some kind of Moses-bringing-down-the-tablets to some people. I could never get past thinking “well NO WONDER you’re a fat-ass if this is news to you!” And I don’t like feeling that way all the time.

Yes, I’ll pause while you die laughing.

So, WW was never my thing. Aside from the Common Sense 101 feeling of the meetings, the heavy insistence on low-fat this and fat-free that bothered me, too. Low-fat cheese? Sure, occasionally. But not as a way of life. Fat-free cheese? HELL. NO. It doesn’t TASTE like anything. I’d rather have a small bit of full-fat cheese that actually tastes like food than a whole plate of fat-free plastic shit that doesn’t resemble cheese in anything but appearance, and usually not even then.

So, people say that WW teaches you how to eat. Sure, maybe it does. There is some talk about portion sizes and food-pyramid balance, but… at the end of the day, I was always feeling a bit deprived because low-fat/fat-free food doesn’t taste good at all. And there’s a REASON why Weight Watchers is a multi-million dollar enterprise: if it worked as well as it says it does, they’d put themselves out of business.

It comes down to math, in the end. Calories in/calories out. Less of one, more of the other. I’m getting there.