Gotta find it

Something’s missing. I don’t know what it is, but there is a void somewhere here and I need to close this gap.

Been writing. It’s all shit. Will never ever see the light of day. I don’t know if writing is helping to fill or expand the void. It’s the weirdest feeling.

I increasingly feel that I don’t belong here. Wherever “here” is. Most of the time, I think it’s New Jersey and I don’t belong here. I’ve lived here 10 and a half years and it still doesn’t feel like home to me. I wonder if it ever will. But sometimes that’s not it. Sometimes I just feel out of place in my LIFE, never mind my location. I wonder if that’s the vast well of untapped potential kicking me in the shins. Probably.

Wouldn’t it be funny if the thing that’s missing from my life is some kind of gainful employment? I don’t think the universe would be punishing me in that way, though.

I just feel so restless.

Something’s missing.

Gotta find it.